Wednesday, 14 March 2007

Stoned (I wish I was)

I find myself in an unusual situation. Well, more unexpected than unusual I suppose. Ever felt like your life is being stolen away from you? And when you come to think about it, you realise with a sudden burst of horror that it is you who is actually doing the stealing. Screwed up eh?

In the meantime time is flying by at a frightening pace as days melt into each other. But the hours seem to have slowed down to a cruelly deliberate pace. Escapes are cut off. So many things clamouring for a piece of your mind that you are always on the brink of losing it. When you try to think you can't. Even with nothing and no one around there is a whirling inside your head that keeps you from letting yourself calm down. You try to remember a simple thing. It takes you so long to clear out the static, you eventually end up forgetting what you were trying to remember.Fortunately, I seem to have caught myself before things begin to really slide off the plane of sanity. And really, it's not so bad :). Also, I have come up with a plan! (Well, I think I have, it might be lurking somewhere behind the smokescreen pervading what passes for my waking mind these days, so not completely sure yet, but getting there.) I'm trying to stare hard down the long road to claiming my life back, hoping to see the end.

Actually I'm kinda hoping for some really really bad weather at this point. Would be a break from the unnervingly flat windless seas. And the boat trips every day that I miss.

Feeling: wired, mired, tired...
Listening to: Dido - Stoned

1 comment:

Vinod said...

:O
Take care man...
Pray tell what be plan?
Actually...