Friday, 27 June 2008

The strains of restraint

I'm actually a little surprised that I'm in the same time zone. Given all that's gone on in between that is. And despite all my complaining about being bored and what not, it's been a very quick three years!! And pretty crazy. In fact I've had to re-define crazy on a pretty regular basis all this while...

This is it though. I admit it, denial feels good, it is a cornerstone of mental comfort for me most days. But acceptance is the key :-<. As if on cue, this trip is a solid example of polar opposites. Having a blast off shift most days. Let's say the other bit's not going so great.

Like they say, this too shall pass. The not so cool thing is, around the corner, that is just waiting to turn into this all over again.

Listening to: Cornershop - Butter the soul

Thursday, 19 June 2008

Blurring faces

I know what I said :|. I said omniscience is over rated. Even the retrospective wisdom kind. There are times, it would seem, when that is not entirely true.It's a shame the mind isn't as perfect a filing cabinet as it's made out to be. Well, maybe it is, just not too user friendly. Ever notice how the very thing you try to recollect appears to escape you entirely? See!! Anyway, my specific grouse is with the little bits of wisdom, sometimes acquired through rather bitter experience, that choose to make themselves unavailable specifically when required /:). And once you've made an ass of yourself, again, then you remember :|. Does this happen to other people? Or is it just me? :(

Given time, most things make themselves more incomprehensible. Unless of course you can actually keep a close eye. Failing that, sooner or later the open book closes. Signs are less forthcoming. Even when they are, they are more difficult to read. Till eventually it's all completely indecipherable. It's recognising the signs of an imminent alienation that's saddening.

Currently: losing touch
Listening to: The Killers - Mr. Brightside

Monday, 16 June 2008


Generally one would be inclined to be depressed when surrounded by other depressed people. No? I don't know, it's been a rather funny (weird, not ha-ha :|) sort of a week. And no better (I hardly think that's the best way of putting it actually, but anyway..) place to find yourself depressed people than in a work boat, cleaning barnacles off streamers.

I'm getting better at this driving thing actually. Was at it for a good 5 hours or so at a stretch yesterday! Have a strained left shoulder to show for it :|. At least I didn't get all smelly and slimy and all that. The couple of trips before that weren't so great actually. Weather was quite on the wrong side of marginal, and I had a few moments. Not the memorable kind.

Have been watching a whole bunch of movies, there seem to be loads of new ones on board this time :D. I wouldn't say they've all been superb cinematic experiences, but since we've taken to watching them in rather large groups in the theatre, there's always the fall back option of collectively dissing the actors, the directors, or whoever / whatever else we can think of. Can be quite an entertaining exercise.

They've also got us one of those Wii things this time :D. And there's a Wii bowling competition on these days :P. Yes we do need these means of entertaining ourselves out here. I actually managed to win my first match :P. Quite an achievement since I've never been bowling, on a Wii or otherwise :P. Of course, it might have helped that neither had my opponent :D.

So that's more or less the weekly news from us on the Western Trident, thank you for reading. Ta!

Currently: bored :|
Listening to: Enrique Iglesias - Escape (too many women on shift :-<)

Wednesday, 11 June 2008

Of settling dust and unsettled minds

There's really no reason why I didn't put this in three days back. I have just been a little preoccupied I guess? Adjustments need to be made. Thought needs to be given to things that bear giving some thought to. And of course, my favourite, the need to indulge in laziness while I still can :).

I officially envy people crew changing from Europe. It would appear that there are very specific routes that pretty much everyone flies. So for only the second time in close to 3 years I actually had company all the way from the first airport to the boat! As a result I actually had a good time on the stop overs, and did hardly as much reading as I might have done otherwise :).

Ironically, this was the best set of flights I'd ever had, two stop overs, each less than 2 hours, and despite that, we had time to spare in each place! Unthinkable in most S-E-Asian airports, I can tell you from bitter personal experience :|. Plus, on my first time through Istanbul, the flight took an apparently unusual route to the landing strip (I was told by those more regular on the route). And despite not being in a window seat, I got a fairly spectacular view of the Bosphorus and of the city straddling two continents! Unfortunately, I hadn't kept the cam with me, being in an aisle seat, so no pics :(.

Since arriving at Perth however, it was a bit more of a downhill slide. Of course the dinner on the pavement and the live music in 'The Moon" were quite awesome. (I guess I'll not go into too much detail about the guy we found repeatedly screaming 'I'm on the f***ing Moon' into his cell phone, only to realise that he wasn't on crack or anything, but was merely trying to provide his location to a mate.) Trouble was, I managed to somehow not sleep at all before a 4 am start. I suppose it was just waiting to happen after 2 nights of practically no sleep, I notched up my worst late appearance on shift to date on Sunday morning :|.

Sleep or no sleep, it didn't take long to figure out that there were a lot more new faces and a lot fewer familiar faces. Again. But hey, at least I've managed a single cabin somehow :D.

It would appear the more you try and simplify something, the more complicated it gets. And what's even worse, what seemed quite uncomplicated from a distance begins to feel not quite as simple up close :|. Options are good I suppose. It's just that these are only beginnings, where they end is absolutely any body's guess :-<.

Ah yes, I've just committed to another planned trip, Euro-rail this time. Not to get too carried away, it's just Italy. And of course, there's that enforced week in Paris for the course. It would seem, I've got a rather interesting break coming up. Too bad it's still three and a half weeks away...

Currently: hoping
Listening to: Coldplay - Swallowed in the sea

Monday, 2 June 2008

No surprises

Figment of imagination alert. Don't believe any of this, it's all lies :|.

I seem to always catch bits of Sex and the City on TV these days. Of course it doesn't help that this seems to be back-to-back episodes week. And on Sunday there was a six hour marathon. That's half the waking day!! /:) So I'll be flicking through the channels and end up stuck on Sarah Jessica Parker's obnoxious face for about five minutes. Then an incredible urge to throw up would cause me to switch again.

But I must say there's something to the narrative style. It's insanely detached! Kinda' like the voice in my head these days. It tells me, very calmly, and more often than not in thorough detail, exactly what's wrong with my life. It just skips the whys :|.

There's gotto be something seriously off when you realise that you are almost waiting to get back to the boat and just get another quick five weeks out of the way! It just can't be right!! And what's even worse (as in the case scarily often with me)? The f***ing familiarity of it all :-<.

Six months! That was it. I was sitting at a table in HN over a rather nice lunch, describing how for the six months before that I'd watched my life slipping into this hypnotic spiral. I'd spend all my time being so pissed off the the fact that I wasn't doing enough with my life, that in the mean time I'd miss all real possibilities of actually doing anything any way!! And it's so difficult to live with downsized expectations all the time, you know?!

The really funny part was, the friend of mine I was postulating my highly philosophical theory to, pointed out that I should probably write this down. But by then I was out of it! I was having fun! Too busy enjoying the now to be bitching and moaning about everything under the sun. Even when I tried, I couldn't for the life of me remember what it was that I should have written down. But ah joy! It's all just rushing back to me now!! X-( It's bloody midnight!! And that's what it looks like outside. The sun still sets I suppose, technically, and rises, but there's no point to it. The evening twilight morphs into the morning twilight and that's it. No night. And as I said, it's not even properly summer yet.

It can't be real can it? A really horrifyingly elaborate version of ground hog day? Six months of bright happy day and six months of dark gloomy night? ... I'm definitely imagining things.

Right, so as I said, it's all lies. Except for the bit about daylight. The photo sort of gives that away.

Currently: insomniac
Listening to: Craig Armstrong - Gentle piece

PS: I hate Gattaca! I always forget the ending. And then, 10 minutes before the end, I'll remember. Without fail! And then get really really depressed :|. Every single time :-<.

Coffee and TV

An unfortunate pair to have significantly influencing one's life :-<. And that's exactly what's been happening to me these days. For some mysterious reason my daily coffee intake has absolutely sky-rocketed. As have the hours of TV viewing. Okay, the latter is primarily thanks to the French Open, so that's probably excusable :D.

No, didn't go anywhere over the weekend. Kinda knew that would happen actually... Spent the entire time feeling sorry for myself as this would be the last weekend before getting back to the ship and hence was as lazy as was humanly possible to be :|. This is why I don't do office rotations in the latter half of my breaks :-<. Oh well, I'll be off again in 2 days. Am a little concerned with rather tight connections in Istanbul in Dubai. But the agents 'assure' me that the time would be sufficient, let's see...

Feeling: lazy
Listening to: Snow Patrol - It's beginning to get to me